First, you need to accept “the Internet” as an entity. Since much of the world now relies on the vague assumption that there is an internet brain, let’s talk about what that brain is thinking about these days.


Bart Simpson and megaphones.

What paper will cut.

It seems some of the more popular videos out there today involve showing us water faucet converters and gadgets that either do something non-essential, or don’t live up to our expectations. Instead of original content, we’ve moved into the world of judgmental content, using the internet to prove out our theories and our knowledge.

Of course, then there is a $400 juicer that has become man’s great enemy.

It only took me about ten minutes of wasted life sitting with a connected Millennial to learn all these things. I’m not sure whether I’m sadder that people have the time to create this kind of content, or that it’s the only kind of content being created.

Bloomberg aside (because they have done us all a public service by exposing the dreaded juice machine), I hope this phase of the internet’s growing up cycle will end quickly. I suspect, however, that it will be like the gangly teenage years and go on seemingly forever, until, one day, we wake up and find intelligent life.

Until then, feel free to join with the 11 million who find watching slime made out of expensive hair products fascinating.

I’ll be in my corner, waiting for an original thought.

Comments are closed.